've been inspired recently to change my look. I've been needing an aesthetic direction for awhile and have been highly encouraged in this endeavor by M., who himself is a master of carefully chosen apparel and accessories. Where did this impulse come from?

One of the most rewarding things we've done at Suluk is forming a relationship with a matron/patron master, saint, or prophet that inspires us and who we feel connected to (we affectionately call them MSPs). We did this in the first year and have continued to nourish that connection through attuning to our MSP with various meditation practices. My main MSP is still very strong in my life, but recently a new one has come in (I'll write about her later).

One very Sufi idea is that by concentrating on your ideal in the form of a person who represents that, you can become that ideal gradually by inviting that person more and more into your life and getting into their consciousness, lifting you out of your limited perspective. I think it's usually done with dead people, but I'm not sure on that point.

Anyway, I recently saw a photo of my new MSP and was very struck by it. Something shone out from her picture that was so appealing and attractive, in both personality and appearance. I've been thinking about her life constantly lately and dreaming about her sometimes. What would it be like to have her conviction, her courage, and her sensitivity? Furthermore, what would it be like to be aesthetically influenced by a person I actually honor and admire, rather than Jennifer Aniston and In Style magazine?

I don't know, but in a fit of hallelujah-style decluttering I went through my closet and pulled out everything I couldn't imagine her wearing, which was a lot that wasn't really me anyway. Maybe her courage and conviction will come, but in the meantime I'll take her hair, her eyebrows, and her language.